Parenting through connection

In the midst of the chaos these past few months Owen has been growing and changing and making my heart want to burst. He is in such fun phase. And yes, I know I say that about every phase. His language is finally taking off and he is talking all the time, making him quite entertaining to be around. He gets super excited about the littlest things and is full of life and love.

We had slipped into a routine in which Ty was basically taking care of Owen and I was taking care of Weston. It makes a lot of sense in that Ty can't breastfeed and when babies are super tiny they need their mom to do the majority of their care. But I quickly realized that if I wasn't spending quality time with Owen he only wanted to be with his dad. He's always been kind of a daddy's boy but it certainly increased in intensity and made me feel awful. I would go into Owen's room to get him up from a nap and he would cry for his daddy. With the postpartum hormones I had to fight back tears at times. So, I decided that I needed to spend some quality time with my first born every day, and it made all the difference. If I spend even just 15 minutes engaged in one on one play time with my Owen in the morning, he wants to be with me and we spend the day working together. 

What a powerful lesson. Above all what our kids crave is our time and attention. Spending quality time with them makes them feel loved, secure and connected to us. It's easy to feel like we are spending time together simply by being in the same space all day long, but it is essential to connect and engage with them every. single. day. I hope that I always remember this. In years to come when Owen and Wes are acting out and misbehaving I will always need to ask myself how much time I've spend with them and how well I've been connecting with them. Right now connecting with Wes is the time we spend while he breastfeeds, snuggling together for naps and wearing him around in the ergo. He craves physical closeness as he adjusts to life outside the womb. Connecting with Owen is playing trains, watching him go down the slide at the park, making pancakes and reading books. He needs my encouragement as he explores his world.  I image in years to come connection will come through watching sporting events, family dinners, vacations and time outdoors. As their needs are ever changing I pray that I will always find ways to connect with my boys so they always feel secure, loved and accepted for all they are. 

8 Week Love Letter

My sweet Weston,

You are a pretty awesome little baby. You are mellow, sweet and go with the flow. At 8 weeks you have already been to Portland, Leavenworth and all around Seattle. You started out small but quickly turned into a little beefcake. You were 7lbs 2oz at birth, 8lbs 8oz at two weeks and 11lbs by one month. It's typical to double your birth weight by six months, so it's no understatement to say you're already growing up way too fast.

You love to nurse and nurse and nurse. There were blisters on your hands when you were born from sucking them in the womb and you proceeded to breastfed for the first 24 hours of your life. You love being in the ergo, laying on your changing table and your big brother. You love being held and prefer to nap in our arms, a moving car or strapped to my chest. While you're still getting the hang of naps, you've started consolidating your night time sleep. I have been feeding you between 7:30-8 pm and then laying you down in your co sleeper for bed. You drift off without a fuss and sleep for 7-8 hours.

I love listening to you breathe, rubbing my cheek against your fuzzy head and the warmth of your tiny body snuggled against my chest. I love watching you and Owen together and I love that he's just as smitten with you as we are. I love that you smile every time you see him despite the fact that he is constantly stealing your binki. I love your steel blue eyes, your toothless grin and kissing your sweet face.

Welcome to the family, my littlest love, I am so glad you're mine.

xoxo
Your loving mama