Sunday, November 24, 2013

30 days of thankfulness

I love the idea of thinking about what you are thankful for throughout November.  A daily post of thankfulness is the latest Facebook fad.  There is something about that that doesn't resonate as genuine with me.  So, I decided to blog what I am thankful for and post it here.  For me.  And the three people who read my blog, of course.

1.  I am thankful for my husband and the 10 years that we have spent building a life and family together.

2.  I am thankful for my mom.  After having a baby I feel closer to her than ever and can count on her for whatever I need.  I am thankful that Owen has a loving nana who is willing to drive to Seattle and spend time with him whenever she can.

3.  I am thankful for my sweet baby Owen and all the joy he has brought to my life.  I am thankful for all that I have learned as a mama and for the vastness of love I feel for my little man.

4.  I am thankful for job.  I love being a nurse and am passionate about what I do.  Furthermore it allows me the flexibility to have a career without sacrificing being with my son.

5.  I am thankful that I have a best friend who inspires me to be more loving and generous.

6.  I am thankful that I live in a city I love.  Seattle is beautiful, progressive and full of opportunities.

7.  I am thankful for my sisters.  There is no bond quite like the sisterhood.  I am thankful that Manda moved to Seattle and we get to spend more time together.

8.  I am thankful for our dog, baby Jake.  He taught me how a pet becomes a part of the family with his constant love and faithfulness.  

9. I am thankful for our church.  We don't go nearly as often as I would like to, but I love having a place we can go to worship, hear a beautiful sermon and fell fulfilled.  I admire Pastor Richard and love hearing him preach.

10.  I am thankful for music.  There is nothing better than a feel good song on a long car ride, singing out a worship song, or a sappy country love song.

11.  I am thankful for organ donation and the way it changes lives.  I witness babies getting a second chance at life through this amazing, selfless gift.

12.  I am thankful that we can afford to live comfortably and provide for Owen.  It seems that no matter how much money you have, it's always end up being just enough.

13.  I am thankful for our little house.  We dream of something bigger but I love the simplicity that comes with a small space.  We are organized and only have room to keep with we really need.

14.  I am thankful that I don't feel the need to use Facebook as a way to show others how great my life is.

15.  I'm thankful for Starbucks lattes in the winter and iced coffees in the summer.  A good coffee can turn the day around.

16.  I am thankful for my access to fresh, organic food to fulfill and nurture my family.

17.  I am thankful for Kelsi, Kari, Katie and Alex.  It's amazing having such a wonderful family in-law to share life in Seattle with.

18.  I am thankful for my dad.  He has a huge heart and loves his family more than anything.

19.  I am thankful for sunshine.  We don't get a whole lot of it in Seattle, so I savor it whenever I can.

20.  I am thankful for the travel experiences I've had.  I've learned so much from the places I've visited and look forward to continuing to explore the world.

21.  I'm thankful for my liberal arts education.  PLU was an amazing school that connected me with a network of life long friends.

22. I am thankful that I was able to get pregnant with ease and was able to have a natural delivery.

23.  I am thankful for good conversations and the way they nourish my soul.

24.  I am thankful for Devin and Olivia.  I am excited to see who they become and love that Owen has cousins so close in age.

25.  I am thankful for Layla and Levi.  I love them dearly and would do anything for them.  Watching them grow has been an amazing adventure and I cherish the time I have with them.

26.  I am thankful for my friend, Danielle.  Our babies are close in age and we have gotten really close sharing the many ups and downs of motherhood throughout the last year.

27.  I am thankful for my PEPS group and the support it provided me with during Owen's infancy.

28.  I am thankful for pilates.  It's the only type of exercise I have ever truly loved.

29.  I am thankful for Steve and Paula.  They are loving and generous people and have always made me feel like part of the family.

30.  I am thankful for Beth and her kindness.  I value our friendship and cherish the time we have together.

31.  I am thankful for a God who loves and fulfills me.  I have believed in God for as long as I can remember and know I would not be who I am today without the love and guidance He has brought to my life.

Saturday, November 9, 2013

11 months

At 11 months Owen is waving bye-bye, no longer hates having his diaper changed, gives kisses, continues to love the bath and is talking up a storm.  He says mama, dada and a whole of gibberish.  Owen likes to dance, is super ticklish and laughs a lot.  He loves being around older kids and watching them play.  Owen loves to play with and antagonize Jake; we were wondering why Jake all of the sudden starting chewing up the baby toys and discovered it's because Owen gives them to him. Owen also chews on Jake's balls, so I guess it's only fair.  They are buds.  Owen went through a hunger strike and refused to eat any solid foods for a few weeks.  Now he is back to eating solids but is much more selective than he used to be.  He opens his mouth for a tiny taste and proceeds to eat only if he decides he likes it. And what he likes varies from day to day.  One days he loves applesauce and the next he won't have anything to do with it.  His favorite foods right now are grapes, cheerios, puffs, veggie soup, spaghetti and yogurt.  Ty made him pancakes and he wouldn't have anything to do with them. What kid doesn't like pancakes?!  He still loves to nurse but is finally starting to wean himself. He is still cruising and crawling his way into plenty of mischief but he isn't standing without holding onto anything yet.  I think we still have some time before the first steps.

Owen loves being around people and seeing his favorites.  He lights up and squeals when he sees nana, Auntie Rach, grammy and grampy.  I love it that he is a people person.  He pretty much loves everybody and seems to remember people.  Once you've met and held him once or twice, he crawls right up to you and wants you to scoop him up.  We somehow avoided the stranger danger phase and he never went through a major period of separation anxiety. His first cold came last month and lasted for weeks.  It went from a runny nose to a cough to a runny nose again.  Although I hate seeing him sick, I'm of the mentally that getting a few colds is good for him, he has to build up that little immune system somehow.

Month 11 brought Owen's first little fit; he screamed and cried when I took a Starbucks cup away from him.  We are now to the point where we have to start thinking about our discipline philosophy and start actually "parenting."  For the majority of the first year the focus is on keeping a helpless little human fed, clean, loved and warm.  As Owen is becoming a toddler he is less helpless and will continue to become more independent each day.  As a parent your job then becomes to teach them how to be a good person; kind, loving, passionate, empathetic, and a productive member of society.  That is a pretty overwhelming job. I can't say we've settled on how we are going to teach and discipline Owen but I am drawn to the emotion coaching school of thought, where you teach kids that all emotions are okay but all actions are not.  I want Owen to know that it's okay to be upset but that doesn't give him the right to lash out.  For now I try and use positive discipline and primarily redirect Owen if he's doing something I don't want him to.   I try to reserve using "no" for situations where I mean business.  Playing in the dog food gets "that's Jake's, how about we play with your train," while climbing on the hot oven gets a "no."  I'm interested to talk to the girls in my PEPS group, as well as my other parent friends about their discipline philosophies and learn more about developmentally appropriate styles.











Saturday, November 2, 2013

No day but today

A patient whose family I really connected with died last week.  I am heartbroken.  The parents are a young, fun loving couple that I sat and chatted with feeling more like they were old friends.   I took care of this sweet girl for the first time when I was pregnant with Owen and they helped me brainstorm names, though I didn't go with Easton as they suggested.  She was readmitted recently and very suddenly went for a toddler with adorable blonde pig tails testing her parents nerves confined in a hospital room to maximum life support.  My job has always been challenging emotionally but this loss hit me harder than any have before.  I think it's largely because I now have a mother's heart and understand how wholly and deeply we love our children.  I also realized that all of the patients I have really connected with over the years have done well.  She is the first of the 8 or 9 who have been especially important to me that has been called home.  I am attending the funeral tomorrow, something I haven't done for a patient before.  This angel will forever have a place in my heart.

When I came home from work sobbing, Ty and I decided that the only way we can honor this sweet angel, and all the others who are taken to heaven too soon, is by loving and cherishing each moment we have with our little man.  A healthy baby is honestly the greatest gift in this world and there is not a day that goes by I don't thank God for my family.  After what happened to Karina earlier this year and the heartbreak that comes with caring for sick children, I am reminded that only so much of life is in our control.  Things can change in an instant.  I don't know what tomorrow will bring but today is something to celebrate.